First Date

I met Don when I would go into the Circle K close to where I lived in Tempe. I noticed him right away because of how he looked at me with those intense blue eyes. I was unemployed at the time, having quit a very toxic job and was contemplating a career change. To get out of the house, I would walk to the Circle K to get a soda or a banana.

Image by Ann Halpin

We started talking some, me shying away from too much interaction. I had never been very confident around men who paid attention to me. But, he persisted in talking with me and I made excuses to go there just so I could see him. There was almost visible electricity between us and others noticed. He told me about his bike when I told him I was thinking about buying one. He even took me into the back room to see it (I wasn't supposed to be back there).  

When I finally bought my bike, I went to the store to tell him and he asked me if I wanted to go riding together sometime. I hesitated and he backed off, but then I said yes, that would be fun. We set up a time, early in the morning (around 6am) after he got off work from the overnight shift on May 25, 2010. That day has been imprinted in my memory.  

I went out and purchased a new outfit for our ride, such a girly thing to do. I wore a pair of capri jeans, a red tank top and a white hoody sweater that zipped up the front and had flowers painted around the zipper.  And, of course, my white bike helmet. Don showed up in his Circle K shirt and cargo shorts. And, of course, no helmet. We met at the start of the bike path at Kiwanis Park.

As we pedaled, we asked each other questions - music, movies, politics, and more - to find out what we had in common. We talked about where we grew up, our families.  After we turned around to ride back, Don proceeded to tell me about his past with addiction and his recovery. He wanted to be upfront with me about his past and his struggles. Never having done drugs in my life, I did not fully understand the implications of what he was telling me. I didn't understand at the time the internal struggles he went through and the demons that ate at his psyche. I told him I had tried pot once but couldn't inhale (I can't even inhale Advair enough to get it into my lungs) and I didn't really like alcohol.  

When we got back to our starting point, he reached out his hand to shake mine and said we should do this again. I agreed but said I was going out of town that weekend to a conference in Kansas City. He gave me his phone number for me to call him if I wanted to do something social with him again.  

Our handshake told me that I would be calling him. He made me so nervous, but not in a scary bad way. This was in an excited scary way. I had never felt that way before when I touched someone. And even after 7 years, the last time we were together, I felt the same way when I touched him. That connection, that electricity between us, never faded.  

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